Saturday, March 24, 2012

The Knot

“So when are you tying the knot?”
For most women beyond the age of 25, the question is not very uncommon to hear. The chachis, the mamis and the buas do start to get a little concerned about the spinster lot in their extended family. Surprisingly, I haven’t been asked that question too often, mostly because of the fact that I went to Xaviers’ college and pursued higher education in Delhi. The former already qualified me as being ‘different’ since the college carries a reputation of admitting all the hippies in town. The latter of course, is explained by the former explanation, ‘She’s different’…(And different, in a not-so-good way). Almost like for a girl to want to be well-educated disqualifies her from normalcy. Anyhow.

But the more important point that I have been preoccupied with is the one about tying the knot. When friends ask me that question, I’m wondering...Where is the suitable boy? Cliché as it sounds, I’m beginning to wonder if I have ever met a man who doesn’t in a tiny part of his brain actually believe that he is entitled to do whatever shit he likes, cuz well, he was born a ‘man’, the privileged birth amongst the two genders! Oh, the lucky bastard! He has a penis! His job is done and he needn't work any harder to achieve anything more in life. The rest of his life shall be a pursuit of activities that only go to reassure him of his masculinity. Of course, most men would deny this allegation when questioned about it. It’s not in any part of their ‘conscious’ being that they have managed to acknowledge even to themselves that this belief underlies all their behaviour. But their behaviour is the key to most actions. Ever tried asking a man to change, or to be different, or to be more sensitive, understanding or caring? The response is universal. They all either think that they ALREADY ARE all of those things and more…and that you expect way too much out of them. OR that they shall change in the future. But did he really change? Find me a man who ACTUALLY once sat down to question himself or his beliefs or understand the sentiments of other people? Why should he? He’s a man! Take it or Leave it.

So what are your options? Either you tie the knot with the hope that they will actually change or if you care even a little bit about your well-being, steer clear from the ‘knot’ lest you’d like to sign up for life full of knotty situations!


  1. Take people as they come. You wanting them to be something doesn't make you entitled to a changeover.
    That being said, I am a man. So what do I care?

  2. Fair enough. But I know plenty men who have preferences and like those fulfilled. It's always easier to take than to give, isn't it? That being said, I don't intend to marry your kind. So what do I care? :)

  3. Haha. "I don't intend to marry your kind." Does that mean you've switched over to the 'other' side? I can't say I'm surprised though. Totally saw that coming.

  4. Yes there are 'only' promises to 'transform' ..and yes the 'knot' is best avoided to avoid the difficult situations..

    My hope lies in finding somebody who will defy these beliefs.. :)
    ..Wishful thinking I know..but I like to spot the twinkling stars in the night sky..and I wish one of those stars fall into your life too :)


  5. I loved the beginning and the ending...the stuff in between your present take on the world, which I'm sure is a phase that will pass. Well definitely are obsessed in living their "masculine" lives and their "noble" organ seems to guide their path at most times. However we women are no less. On numerous occasions we have been told and seen that men are guided by their inflated sense of ego and that they are constantly caught up in trying to be the "Hercules" of the tribe they belong to...yet we constantly expect them ..these rowdy horny shower some sweet love on us!!
    Marriage in doubt about it! But we've got to stop making the same mistake over n over again. Either we play the game and try to win the heart (and by heart i mean penis) of the noble Hercules..or simply steer clear from it all and indulge in the masculine pursuit of Other things like Power, Prestige and the rest.
    The problem is ..we want it all!

    For example...if you had an a secret weapon in your pocket that had the power to solve all of world's problems..would you keep quiet about it, and not use it as a tool to exercise power over those who didnt?

    I m sorry i rambled on...

  6. hahaha i dont think guys are that bad.. i like them muchhhhh more than girls.. so easy to hang out with. no issues :)